Bleargh

Benefit is in town! Hurrah hurrah hurrah indeed for those of us who just can’t get enough makeup.

I told cousin SelAnn about it cause when she wasn’t working yet and had all the time in the world to stay online at odd hours like myself, she and I used to browse Sephora.com and talk about cool makeup brands that weren’t sold in Malaysia. One of these brands was Benefit (yes, I insist on italicising the "f". I am, after all, an anal sub-ed). So, when I read that a Benefit counter has finally opened at Parkson KLCC - which, by the way, has gotten way hipper than it used to be (they have Paul & Joe too but at Subang, yay!) - I got giddy with excitement.

I don’t really know why though. I mean, I have a whole box of expensive makeup (one of the perks I had when I was still reporting hehe) but I hardly use any of them. Still, a girl loves brand new makeup - whether or not she ever wears them is entirely NOT the point.

Plus, pay is in today woohoo! It’s too late to get a DVD boxed set of Will & Grace season six from my ahem, "friends", so on Sunday it’s shop til’ you drop time at KLCC. Maybe R and H can join me in my giddy retail revelry.

Tomorrow, of course, Elaine and I will fulfill our Aunty duties and part-a-y heart-a-y at the Aunty Chong-Hope wedding reception. I promise to take as many pictures as my trusty XD-card can take, both funny ones and pretty ones.

Aunty Pih, wait for it!

Fare thee well my lovelies. I’m off to get drunk.

I kill people.

The other day Daryl was telling some of his stupid jokes about me to this PR chick who came to the office. He told her that every artiste or actor that I have met are now dead - literally and metaphorically.

I hit him on the head and profusely denied everything.

But when I got home I thought hard about what he said and I have to say, I wasn’t at all too happy with the outcome.

You see, Daryl was right. I am cursed. Most of the bands I have interviewed are no longer together. Some of the singers I’ve met are no longer singing. A number of them are divorced. A few of the people I have spoken to are even dead. Dang.

Steve Irwin - dead

Rapper Proof of D12 - dead

Spice Girls - broke up

The Cranberries - broke up

Richie Sambora - divorced

Chester Bennington - divorced

Wes Borland of Limp Bizkit - left the group

Eminem - "retired"

Frankie something of The Darkness - left the band

Aqua - broke up (though the chick and one of the guys did get married)

Mutya Buena of Sugababes - left the band

Armand Assante - when was the last time you watched a show that starred this guy???

I can’t think of the others at the moment but I’m quite sure there are more. On the upside though, there are also a few people I’ve met who have prospered tremendously.

Ang Lee - I had a one-on-one interview with him for The Hulk. I told him his Hulk looked too plasticky. He laughed. Two years later Brokeback Mountain came out and kicked ass. And mine. Hehe.

Jerry Bruckheimer - I met him during Black Hawk Down in 2001. I asked him what it was about the film that made him so sure it’ll be a hit. "I just know," he said. The film, of course, sucked, so whatever it was Jerry B. "knew" was pure BS. At least, that’s what I thought then. A year later CSI: Crime Scene Investigation made its debut on TV. A year after that, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl was released. And after five years, Amazing Race is still the most popular reality-based game show worldwide. Well, I guess you do know Mr Bruckheimer sir. (He produced all those titles, in case you didn’t know.)

Been stuffing myself with mooncakes. Well, not really. It’s more like I’ve been stuffing my fridge with mooncakes. I’ve only eaten one, which took me a week to finish by the way. Anyways, the office has been getting quite a number of mooncake packs from well, other companies, so like the good loyal employee that I am, I try to steal as many mooncakes as I can.

Okay maybe not really "steal"… Technically, all those mooncakes go to the company even though the cards read "To this editor" or "To this Desk", so as an employee I have a right to them m’cakes. Right?

Yes, I know. I’m a loser. But hey, who doesn’t love free stuff? Especially of the edible kind?

Anyways, I have been feeling a little guilty about these petty "thefts" that I’ve been doing in the office so I’ve balanced it out by cleaning out my CD collection, and giving away redundant CDs to the Art Department.

I now feel slightly better.

Perhaps I’ll clean out my CD collection at home too and then give them away to the Pre-Press people up on the 11th floor.

Ah, yes, it feels good to be nice. It would have felt even better if I had kept my good deed to myself and not bragged about it like I just did but I’m not that kind of a person y’all.

At least not today. Today I want to be a bitch. And it feels effing great… so far.

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And on a non-bitchy note I’d like to wish VH a happy 30th birthday! VH is a dear friend whom I’ve known for close to a quarter of a century. Yep, we are THAT old. Happy days babe!

I missed LC’s hen night last Friday. Not to worry though cause ET and I are planning another one soon (heh heh) though perhaps it won’t be as wild as the one she had with her other friends.

Still, I can’t help but post this.

Yes I know, I am EVIL. But hey, look at that face! It’s too damn funny to not share with everyone. Besides, I put it up for JP (who has sooooo been missing) to see in the comforts of her home in Melbourne and to laugh her ass off.

Heh heh. I wonder what the girls made her do to have her pulling this face…

I am so dead for putting this up here.

I had a "pet" crocodile when I was younger. My dad worked at the natural history section of the museum back home, and when the museum wanted to expand its er, I guess its space to include a botanical garden and a mini zoo exhibition, my dad and his staffers caught a baby crocodile.

The croc, or Buaya as we all called it (yes, not very creative, but it’s not like the reptile complained), sort of became my dad’s responsibility, so he had to feed it or remind people to feed it. Buaya ate lots of fish - my dad always bought the cheapest type because the money came out of his own pocket, if I remember correctly. Sometimes, Buaya would get chicken and meat as well, but I think the museum paid for that.

At the same time, we also had a pet wild boar, which my dad and his staffers caught during one of their hunting sessions. The boar, which one of my brothers named "Ngok", lived at a pen behind our tiny house initially. When it got too big and too smelly, my dad decided not to kill it and send it over to the museum grounds instead.

So, Buaya and Ngok lived in harmony, in separate pens of course, at the museum. I used to follow my dad to the pens to feed them. I loved Buaya. He (actually I have no idea what sex it was, but I assumed it was male) made more of an interesting pet than Ngok, who was more my brother’s pet. Besides, Ngok was too needy and made too much noise, squealing at every single thing that went by his pen. Buaya, on the other hand, just laid there… blending in with his surroundings.

Meanwhile, the construction of said botanical garden and the mini zoo took a long time to complete. Too much red tape I suppose. Government. Hmph. 

So, by the time everything was properly done, Ngok had died of old age while Buaya died of poisoning. That’s right. Some idiot poisoned my Buaya. Poor things.

Earlier this week, the Crocodile Hunter died in a freak accident that involved, of all things, a stingray. Poor guy. Poor wife and kids.

My parents loved the Crocodile Hunter. My dad complained about his stunts sometimes, but he was still a big fan. He was pretty excited when he found out that I had an interview with Steve Irwin at Singapore a few years back. I think it was because he actually knew who my interviewee was, one of the few celebrity names that was familiar to him.

I was quite sad about Steve Irwin’s death. Obviously I didn’t know him personally, but hey, I met the guy - we shook hands and we talked. He was visibly tired at the interview, he spoke softly and was a little serious - not like his TV personality at all. It was only when he started talking about animals that he got a bit animated and lively. I thought it was rather touching, really, to see him in that light.

So long.